HOW TO INVITE OTHERS INTO THE CONVERSATION ONLINE.Engagement. I really HATE that word. Engagement is the most commonly used word for soliciting interaction from followers on social platforms. Engagement on social platforms is used like fishing. Bait. Hook. Catch (ie. click, comment, DM). Toss into the boat or back into the water (ie. pitch a sale). Start over. Over time, the social platform rewards you with a small net. Repeat. The social platform rewards you with a bigger net. Repeat. The thing no one wants to tell you about this process: those ‘catches’ are HUMANS. There IS a better way.  Instead of getting caught up playing the fishing for Engagement game, you can instead work to develop relationships that will grow the metrics that actually matter in your business.
There is a simple tool you can use to start developing connections and nurturing REAL, HUMAN relationships. Door Openers. Door openers are an invitation to a conversation that allows the other person to determine the depth of their response. More than just a simple greeting or passing social response; they signal that you are genuinely open and available to connect (not just sell) and encourage exploration, and discussion. “You mentioned in your stories that you just started working from home. How’s the transition been?” “Oh, you like to cycle? I just started. I’d love to know more!” “I see you prefer podcasts over physical books too. I’d love to know more about why?” The KEY to door openers is that once the door is open, you have to KEEP IT OPEN, regardless of a pitch or sale. You don’t use door openers to get Engagement. You use door openers to start developing Relationships. Some of these relationships may turn into - direct sales; - word of mouth; - answer to questions you have; - referrals; - friendships; or - a conversation. I’m NOT saying to drop all of your personal boundaries and spend all of your time online talking to everyone. I AM saying that we need to ditch the “what am I getting out of this” attitude and remember that business is about serving HUMANS. You are Engaging with Real People - so let’s treat them that way. I’d love to know what you think about Engagement in the comments!
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Why pitching or throwing your services at someone before truly listening shuts down the conversation.Selling before Listening. The truth is, most people don’t want you to solve their problems for them; they want someone to listen to them and have a chance to listen to themselves. Think back to a time when you were trying to open up to someone about a struggle you were having, but they immediately threw solutions at you. How did you feel?
I’ve been there too.  As a helper, regardless of your title, the first step to developing any relationship, making any pitch, or making any sale is LISTENING.
TRULY LISTENING. Not to stock up on opportunities to overcome objections or to solve their problem. Just to listen. Feeling the need to help can be distracting; we want so badly to ease their pain and solve their problems. When you think about it, most people have already had their fill of ‘advice’ and need a moment just to feel heard. Contrary to popular belief, listening is not passive. It is HIGHLY ACTIVE as you take in the facts, the person’s feelings, and understand their perspective. Our job as the helper is not to solve their problem or throw our offers on the table any chance we get. It’s to give them a safe container or space to discover their own power, merely offering tools and guidance that empower them. So, how can you help the other person feel heard?
When someone feels truly heard and understood, something incredible happens. Trust begins to develop. Trust is the most essential part of marketing, sales, and business. When you have a person’s trust, you will likely have their business, their friends and family’s business, and you’ll KEEP IT. Now, tell me in the comments whether you agree! |
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